Fucked...

Ohhh, how I is love me some Irony. Today big start to convention for Republicans. It is 3 years since the Republican fucked the Gulf Coast and New Orleans over. Now, Bush and Cheney cancel they speeches and not go to the convention, because they got to figure out what to do. God is pissed. Very, very, pissed. So is Momma Earth. A category 5 storm is a bad mojo, by the way. The Republicunts can't blame this one on the gays...well maybe that woman running mate to McCan't will try.

Whooooo???

Call him Senator McCan't. Who is advising this tool?? He picks a WOMAN for his running mate, from major corrupted state, with lots of oil. This is blatant attempt by Republican party to get "the woman" vote, yes? Not very thinly veiled, no? Sarah Palin (R gov.) is John's new Vice President pick...with only two year experience. Was there no one left in Republican party good enough, without skeletons or corruption in they pocket? Did they have to go to ALASKA to find someone? Does she not look like she played a teacher in a porn vidjeo?

JESUS! Here we is going again...

Time for Some Campaignin' | Funny Jokes at JibJab

He is a Leo!!

Happy Belated Birfday Mr. Future President!! (Aug 4th) You look great for 47. Then again, black don't crack. Somewheres there is a blind dread locked black man sing you Happy Birfday to you...
(oh come on, you is all love a little Stevie)

Back Bitches!!

brenda dickson parody


Hey you crazy American peeps. I is back damn it! I was away for a brief year, due to many death threat. Yes! So now that I have big security detail that would make Condee Ricepatty envious, I can now make fun of every persons! Yippy, you better watch out!!

This shit is funny. This person is a terrorist too! A terrorist on the retinas of all Americans!

Darkies in the News...

Here we is go again! Another poor pregnant lady person murdered and dumped like a piece of garbage. Allegedly, by boyfriend person, who has estranged wife and some kids. Oh yes, alleged killer is Po-Po.

Eyes of a killer? Maybe. Eyes of a Po-Po? Oh hell to the yes! I probably shouldn't drive camels after that comment.

Eyes of a stupid bitch that lie to police? Maybe. Eyes of fat bitch that is so insecure about herself that she is listen to ANYONE who give her attention, including crazy Po-Po? Oh hell to the yes! Say hi to Paris Hilton, Ms. Miyesha Ferrel!

Gee Ain't It Swell...

Chancellor Angela Merkel: Oye Putin! Can you believe this fuck lick?

Prime Minister Vladimir Putin: Giiiirrrrllll, tell me about it. By the way I gave his wife a Stolichnaya enema and borscht douche last night. She didn't even say a word.

CAM: Frigid bitch. You know she served latkes and matzoh ball soup at tea the other day? You think that was a jab at us Germans?

PMVP: Didn't she run over that person in a fine German made automobile? Seems to be a lot of killers at the G8 this year!

CAM: I think George just farted.

President George W. Bush: (Heeehee, I did poopy! I want to meet Boris and Natasha.)

Why I is Drive a Camel...

Gas is $3 a gallon now. Not one of you fuckers protest this bullshit, all you just take it in ass with not one bit of lube. Exxon make record profit 2 year in row, Bush is opening drilling site in protected national reserve, and the honey bees are dying off in record number. Jihadist Jerry used to living in desert. Will you be? Bitches.

No Shit...

For two year in row, Miami is vote the worst city to drive. Number one for roadrage, yes!! Jihadist Jerry knows this many time over. I have to use my Glock many, many time on this stupid people. I is used to think it was the Jews, then the Canadian snow birds, then the Puerto Ricans, or the Cubans, or the Hatians. Then JJ realized it ALL this stupid fucks. I lose my mind many time!! My camel kick and scream everytime I take them to the supermarket, when I is live there. Miami is a shithole thirdworld country full of morons and retards. This honor is well deserved, yes!

Size no Matter...

Tom Sizemore get arrested again for have pipe to smoke Crystal Meth. What huge obvious sign that this drug is soooooo moronic. Poor Sizepoo, he is addicted to stuff that kill them gays in numbers. Just say no Tom. Or at least switch to Coke.

Ewww Gross....

Ok, so in a place call Oregon a boy complain about something tap dancing on he eardrums. Then his mother take him to doctor where they find SPIDERS living in his ear canal. The size of eraser on end of pensil. Swear to Allah, look up bitches. Google this shit. Nasty mother no keep clean house. This is actual quote from redneck child.

"It was real interesting, 'cause, two spiders in my ear — what next?" Jesse said.

Nasty shit no? What next is, someone need to call a social worker on you momma

Oil and Water....

Did you is know that water companies are now charge a OIL fee to offset cost of raising gas prices? Yes, if you get water deliver to your job or house, check the bill. Water companies are now charging to deliver overprice water thanks to you wonderful conflict in Middle East. Might as well just drink the oil, yes?

Darkies in the News...

Homo and the Homophobe. Black man hate the gay, a little too much. Maybe he self loathing?
This is big headed super singer run over a darkie from Africa in her Range Rover. Nothing could be more ironic.
This darkie smokeup, get busted with the drugs and the guns and the hoes and still he say he no guilty. Cocky shit. I like him so much, yes! The goats are part of the Dawg Pound Fan Club!

Brrrrr....

Jihadist Jerry get first snow!! I is try and catch many on tongue, then I froze my cute little tushy off. My goat and camels have many fur. I is too skinny to keep really warm. Can't wait for the springtime, yes!!

Funny Stuff...

So he is charismatic. He look you in eye. Good strong handshake. The camera loves him. Does anyone actually know where he stands on issue? And really, as racist as this country is you is think all this money he spend to try become President, worth it?

Nudie...

Look, Jihadist Jerry take nudie picture of hisself. J.J is into photography now, and say what the hell why not do a self portrait? I like my tushy, yes.

Jack and the Beanstalk...

I was telled about this show called 24 yesterday by this hottie at gym. I never hear about it or watch before. I is a HERO kinda man. But, I is love this show now!! Super good, yes. Bad Lebanese and torture and stabbing, and people violating the Constitution. SOooooo good. I addicted. Not sure why Jack Bauer was in Chinese prison for two years though.

White Devil...

She'll be coming around the mountain, when she comes...fucking camel foreskin whore monger. And war monger too, yes! Him and the Dick Cheese Vice President is trying to get the pot stirring. Keep pushing those Iranian buttons. You no have to worry about them, it is the rest of the world you piece of goat dung! If America let this man go to war with Iran, and yes, he is trying very, very, very hard, then you all suck. PLEASE, NO MORE WAR!! You wanna kill Muslims Bush? Go to Dafur, there is some bad ones there. Just ask any 12 year old girl whose vagina is permanently scarred by them scum bags.

John Candy is ALIVE!!!

Did anyone see all the hideousness Perez Hilton tried to pull off this New Years Eve in the Times Square MTV place?? First he is try and pull off purple that even a retarted American children's dinosaur couldn't pull off, but he had costume changes, yes! My goats and camels almost laughed theyself to death when he came out in sailor suit. Tragic fat fairy fuck. Who in charge of taking away the princess points for this Mary??

Corporate B.S...

Jihadist Jerry is hope you all have good Christmas! I even wish the Jews a good Chaunika (who really knows how to spell that word?). Now that you stressed youselves out by running around you towns buying a million presents, wasting you hard earned money, just to feel miserable and let down, how is your New Year gonna be? I is say your resolution for 2007 should be about youself. No more bending over backwards just to make everyone else happy just so you get some recognition. No more selling yourself out for money. No more cheap toilet paper. This year give back to this stinking pie hole we call Earth by creating more positive energy!! Do something about those little black people who is dying by the second in Dafur! Buy a sandwich for some homeless person on the street no matter how much they wallow in they own feces! Tip a dragqueen, no matter how bad they lipsink yet another Britney Spears song! Plant a tree! Kiss a retard! Mercy fuck a troll! And do it all with a smile, yes!

Burnin' Down the House...

Oh no!! Hottie Jake-y-poo is burn down his vacation rental in California where he and his sister were celebrate fake Christian holiday steeped in paganism and taken over by corporate America! I is hope they is all ok though, because I really like all of them Gyllenthal kids! Did you know that Jake-y-poo lives on same street as Jihadist Jerry?? I can look into his appartment from mine! I is never seen him naked though. I think my camel has, though.

Hanging to the Left...

He is killer of many people including his own, and Iranians. He rape many women, torture Kurdish children, and pilage many village. He go to jail, go on trial (which would give Seinfeld a run for its money) and was no allowed any appeals. So snap his neck is a great way to end his legacy, no?? So violence bigots more violence, yes? Eye for eye? How does showing this act prove to those dirty little Iraqi children (smell like camels) that its ok to reciprocate violence with more violence? Is this humane? Let see how Mr. Bush exploits this one!

Pee in the Pod...

Guess who is getting another child in her vagina??!! It is Miss Julia Roberts who become famous by playing a whore! And a diabetic, remember that haircut in Steel Magnolia?? Congrats, hope the little monster no have big teeth like you!

Pick your Stink!!

She's got one. (Bottle is as smooth as her bald stretched out puss.)
Unbelievably, she has gots one too. (Smell like burned up 45 year old 'gina)

And for Christmas or Jew Holiday, you too can smell like one of Antonia Banderas' three colognes!! Yes, three!! Who was the marketing genious who approached Mr. Banderas and wife and tell him to make 3 types of cologne?? And, why do we have to sit through all these freaking commercials with Naomi Campbell, Antonia Bandaid, Sarah Jessica Farter, Britney, Paris, Carlos Satana? I is wonder if O.J. Simpson will make one too!!

That's It!!

If Jihadist Jerry see one more tragic 'gina from some tragic Hollywood starlette, I is turn complete gay!!! And what is that white patch on Ms. Hiltons cooter? Yeast? Spermicidal jelly? I wonder if Britney borrow that dress after, yes?

*click to enlarge (but becareful of your retina)

Pretty White Woman!

My friend Max's sister won crazy American reality show where skinny girls try to become like Tyra Banks, big forehead and all! I is like her very much, she is make me laugh and she tell that dirty Indian (dot not feather) photographer to go fuck hisself in nicer way. Congrats Caridee, you is best winner ever on America's Next Top Model!! I is like you bother Max, even if he is a Jew. Many camel kisses, with you Cover Girl lipgloss.

Demon Child...

Evil gay woman Mary Cheney and her partner Heather Poe is expecting a baby! (Who is man in this couple??) Anywho, if there is any justice in hell, this sell out to her people will have a gorgeous child that looks something like below. I is wonder what the cravings are going to be.

Yummm!

Michael Richards no like black people? Why not? There is so much women to love! He need to be in big sandwich with these two women so there be no more crazy rants at seedy dirty comedy club. I is hear that he will meet with the black hecklers from the audience to smooth things over. Too late!

The Bald Gutter

And if you is look close enough, you can see the cesarian section scar from having Sean Preston. But you no is blame me for the burned retina you get from looking too hard. I no think I can eat for a month.

No Such Luck!

Yesturday, Fed-X's lawyers say they have no porn tape of Britney and Fed-X doing the hibbity-dibbity. You know, plowing from behind etc. I know they is many people upset by this because world is very curious of what happened behind closed doors with them, yes!! Does she chew gum (a la Matt Lauer interview) while suck dick?? And, just how big IS Fed-X's dick??

Big Balls, Mr. Simpson!!

Ok, American bee-yotches! I is back in the hizouse! I is know I be gone for much long time but I had to go on a journey! Much to tell you later. But now, lets give a round of applause to the A++ dumbest black man in America. O.J. Simpson actually wrote book called "If I Did It" IF??? IF!!! Whatever, more like "How I Did It"! Is anyone just holding breath in anticipation of that fool's karma catch up to him?? The goats say...yes!!

Did Someone Say Satan?

Leave it to the Catholics to piss the world off! He is soooo sorry that Muslims are reacting to his bigoted words. He is just no upset about saying them. Well he managed to alienate the Jews, Muslims, and gays in his short time as Pope of the religion that embraces pedophilia. Way to go Nazi boy, you are a jewel in the eyes of Allah.

Take That Lance Bass!

She is from IRAN!!! Whooo hooo, sexy woman come to America, make much money and now is floating around in space. Not only is President Bush super pissed at the CIA for not kidnapping her and putting her in secret prison in Romania on trumped up charges, but that super homo Lance Bass is probably pissed at all American homosexual people for not sending him enough money to go first. His mascara is running in rivers down his porcelain white homo skin. HAHAHAHA, she is IRANIAN!!

Random Blllaaaahhhhhh....

I love being alive damn it. I just love it. Dispite all the hate and anger in this world there is nothing better that sitting on some open field during a full moon and gazing at the clouds. Have you ever just done that? Just stared at the clouds on a full moon??? Silvery, luminescent, alive. I love the smell of camels. I know, much gross. But they just be. They just are. I hate that people in this world will kill over religion or color or gender or persuasion. Call me a hipocrit. I don't care. I know it happens. I am alive, and I live the best way I can damn it. You is do the same. Please, the world depends on it.

Pretty People Is Smart!

Well, I is think all stupid ugly redneck should listen good. Since you losers do nothing but try and emmulate super star celebs, maybe here is one good example you should take. Angelina/Brad and Charlize/Stuart say they is no get married until ALL the peoples can get married. (That means the gays for those too dumb to read between the lines). I think this is good idea yes. However technically they is live in sin by doing just this, but the Bible, Tohrah, and Koran is nothing but good stories yes??

Cum bucket...

This whore trash skank slut waste of space get busted for drive drunk. She say she just want a hamburger (whhhaaaaa, daddy I want it, I want it now!!!). SOOOOoooo, now everyone say this American sweet heart do nothing real big. No big deal. Ohhhh suuuurrrreeeee, everything is fun and games until you is run over a Mexican migrant worker and her 4 children get their brains splattered all over your Bentley grill and keep on driving since you are so fucked up on the weed, and hootch that you is no notice. Just because America love you soooo much and you must only eat one meal a day. How is this person famous???

And Its Prettier Too!

According to scientist is Africa, if men get they penis clipped it was help reduce HIV infection by 60%! This is what they say, Jihadist Jerry swear! Cicumcision help prevent AIDS, I is can see the PR companies coming up with great slogans!

--"Tell AIDS to stick it, when you clip it!!" ...a message from the World Health Organization.

Here is idea you dumb fucking doctors, preach importance of not screwing everything you see without wrapping it up first!! Duh. I mean how is circumcision supposed to help prevent HIV? Everyone try to come up with new schemes to make AIDS less scary. I is always found truth to be a bit more acceptable. (Hint, Hint Mr. Bush)

Pet Peeve of the Day...

Like, Oh My Allah!! I is meet this one person who no shut the fuck up. Ever. I mean go on and on and on! About nothing, seriously! Nothing more annoy than person who talk or make noise just to hear themselves talk or make noise. Some say it is ego, some is say it is nerves, I is say it enough to drive me to drink. The person is very nice and sweet, but Jihadist Jerry actually spend many hours roam the streets so he no have to spend time alone with this person because the is gonna tell story that is take 3 hours to tell. Confusious once say "Silence is Golden", no? Maybe I should donkey punch this person in the groin, no?

Whore!

Christie Brinkley = Goldiging Whore, yes! So much for value of institution of the marriage right?? I is seriously doubt that anyone should critisize the homo people for try and get equal marriage right when this skank is break up with hubby number 4!! Or how about Jenny Lopez, or Britney? How about Anna Nicole Smith, yes?! These people scoff at the sanctity of marriage and yet in Massachusettes nasty Christian Bible thumper want to take marriage away from the gays. Funny, neither Spain, Canada, the Netherlands, or MASSACHUSETTES has fall of the Earth because of this actions. Is there a God??

I is Heart This Chick!

I is go see PINK! perform at Today Show this morning. Me and goats have secret crush on this amazing rock and roll chic, yes!! She is one bad as mo'fo and I think she brilliantly tell President he is a scum sucking pig. This is someone who little girls should look up to, yes! What a way to kick off Jihadist Jerry's 100th post! Many camel kisses!